Celibacy
A phenomenon brought about by lack of opportunity for same-sex relationships in a predominantly heterosexual world.
I remember periods in my life when I have chosen to be celibate since it opens possibilities for relating to people without viewing them as potential lovers so I'm finding my communications much warmer, much more spontaneous.
The thought of celibacy used to create deep fear in me, a deathfear. About half of my adult life has been celibate. I can't say that I was mostly happy when sexually active nor mostly miserable when celibate. Whenever I get an obsession with sex, or the lack of it, I get on with living my life to the full.
If it comes to having a choice of only sexual relations which are based on power and dominance, then I prefer to remain celibate.
Sometimes I get dramatic and say 'this is it'. But then someone comes along and changes my mind. Whenever I've been celibate, it's been for health reasons.
I didn't even know what celibacy meant till I arrived on the gay scene. I found out simply because people were so much more open about their sex lives. I have never chosen to be celibate – I prefer to go along with the old Quaker saying, 'Way will show', i.e. let's just see what happens.
Some older experienced people can choose this. For many young people, not losing their virginity is highly, highly frustrating. (It was for me!)
Celibacy should be an accepted option for however long it makes sense.