Bisexuality
I'd rather be bisexual half the time than heterosexual all the time.
It is entirely for me as an individual to decide exactly where my attraction may lie and for nobody else to insist that I conform to their specifications. Bisexuality for me has nothing to do with 'swinging'; it is about the ability to respond to someone without the obligation to leave well alone because of gender.
We must not think of ourselves as second class gays, but as first class people. No bisexual I have ever known thought of themselves as a second class straight.
We are not sitting on the fence – we are building a new garden.
If people could only accept that sexuality is infinitely variable and that it was never meant to be confined to the parameters it has been, then not only would MY life be easier but the world would become a much better place.
Like many people I teas so scared of my own gay feelings that I found it easier to dislike in others what I disliked in myself. Looking back I must not criticise myself because the anger I felt then was protective in keeping safe a part of me I could not handle. I found that liking men did not alter my feelings towards women. In fact I got on better with women because I was more relaxed.
A heterosexual lover once said that she would always love the part of me that could belong to her, but she understood that to possess me entirely would be to smother the essential 'me' that made me so dear.
I feel VERY bisexual at the moment and very positive. I just wish there were more bisexuals around and that non-bisexuals would accept my choices more.
So what if I WAS sexually attracted to men as well as women? Did it make me any less of a human being? Was my friend any less of a human being for being gay? Why did I feel that intolerance towards gays was intolerance towards me? I wasn't gay. I loved women too, but if you loved men at all you were a 'poof' or a 'queer' and that meant you were dirty and that you couldn't love women. I mean, NO ONE is going to believe you can like both and not be 'confused'. I've fantasised about men and women so much that I wouldn't know which I preferred.
Since heterosexuality is so ingrained in the prevailing consciousness, it becomes almost impossible to get some heterosexuals to recognise that any valid alternatives exist. I think the word 'normal' was created by those people who are afraid to say 'heterosexual' just because their fear of the body is such that they dare not admit to sexual feelings.
I've always seen myself identified as loving both sexes. Until I came across the term bisexual I was a long time without a label. I've very ambiguous feelings about labels but despite the misconceptions about bisexuality, saying I'm bisexual seems less of a non-statement than salting I'm neither straight nor lesbian.
Misguided assumptions have slowly been strangling my sexuality since birth. Can people conceive of the damage they do with their simple' well-worn phrases and their bland assumptions? How much growth have I myself stunted in other people by my unthinking repetition of inherited heterosexual prejudice?
For me, being bisexual is part of being open to myself. I have always tried to see things from both sides. I don't understand why more people don't acknowledge that both men and women are sexy. I guess it's because I like people.
My preference is only for individuals; I fancy some and I don't fancy others. I can get up in a morning, wander down the street and see maybe thirty I fancy, some men and some women.